Stand Fast Lesson II - Fear

It happened right here--outside this door

What is Carmen afraid of; what brings her to tears and completely immobilizes her—besides 300 people entering into an event while she holds the wrong table seating chart in her hand….of course, you know it….it’s frogs.

I can barely type the word without trembbbllbingon the keyboard.

Last time I visited Malawi, I boasted how God did not allow me to see any frogs. I was confident this time would be the same…however, I was soon to discover that I was to be sadly mistaken.

My roomie and I slept in bunks in the LION mud hut. It was the shortest walk to the bathroom from our hut—God worked out that detail wonderfully well for me even after I didn’t want to be in the mud hut to begin with (another story). Anyway, I had my wind-up flashlight from Costco and each night I took two or three trips to the restroom. Each time I became braver and sometimes I did not use the flashlight at all; instead, I'd stop to stare at the southern hemisphere night sky and enjoy it's fullness and beauty even though I didn’t recognize much.

It rained most of the time we were there. Usually at night we would get these terrific thunder and lightening storms which kept a few of us out on the veranda of the dinning hall catching lightening bolts, oooooing and ahhhhing at the shapes, brightness and closeness of the strikes. Twice we lost power but only for a short time. It was exciting. The rain brought out the crickets and the frogs of course, but I hadn’t seen any of them and they sounded far off to me, so my boldness continued with each trip to the restroom. Eventually I didn’t even look at the steps before me because I felt confident nothing would be there. Famous last feelings…..

One particular night, I went to bed and had a terrible nightmare about snakes. I have this recurring dream about snakes and literally it woke me up with a shocking gasp. My heart beat like a jackhammer in my chest and I cried because I had no one to cuddle up to. Then, to make things worse, it happened, I had to go to the bathroom.

Oh, I didn’t want to get out of that bed, but nature called. Reluctantly and nervously I got out the flashlight and gingerly stepped out the front half door that was closed and latched. I walked guardedly to the restroom checking every step along the way and scanning in the nooks and crannies of the bathroom for any unwanted reptilian visitors. Of course there were none. I finished washing my hands, switched off the lights and headed back for the hut. I stopped to enjoy the sky hoping to spot the tiny galaxy my friend was enthralled with. It was not visible tonight...too many rain clouds. I switched on the light and flashed it on the front step so as not to miss it and there they were…a pair of them Egyptian plagues sitting on either side of my doorway. I froze.

I froze solid like Lot’s wife after looking back at Sodom. I just stood there frozen like a popsicle. Then I whimpered and sniveled and wondered who I could wake up at 3 in the morning to get these frogs out of my space. Of course, I couldn’t wake anyone up. They weren't moving, they were just sitting there blocking my way. Those d=%# frogs were acting more like squatters instead of passers by. They were not going anywhere and I was frozen to the bit of ground just outside my hut.

I began waving the light at them and making a little bit of stomping and clapping noise in hopes that they would vacate the premises, but they didn’t. They just sat there...immobilized! Perhaps they were afraid of me, I thought. And then that other little voice piped in... “Oh no they’re not. They are just waiting to jump on you!

Remember when you were 5 in your Easter Sunday best dress and that frog jumped on your leg and wouldn’t get off. It was trying to suck the very life blood out of your body and your father had to pry it off with his bare hands?” Ahhh, a panic cry fest began as I stood outside just three feet from my room door and safety.

This was definitely the work of the devil, I thought. First I had the terrible dream and now this...live frogs, two of them blocking my door. Why does the devil always attack me in this way I wondered as I tried again the light and movement technique. Time passed, minutes that seemed like an eternity stand off with the frogs. Finally one of the frogs began to loose it’s nerve and move around. Of course this freaked me out even more.

I thought perhaps they were formulating an attack plan to get me from either side, devious little creatures. The one on my left side was getting jittery and I stepped back. Soon he hopped a 180 degrees and went away into the dirt. I was so relieved.

Then I looked over at the one on my right side. I could tell, he was bolder and bigger. He stayed put. He liked the cover of my little thatched roof and the clean cement of my little stoop. He wasn't going anywhere.

Finally, I determined I could not stand there all night like a frightened little girl. I had to make a break for it. The only thing that freaked me out even more, was remembering that in order to get into the hut, I had to stop and undo the latch on the bottom half of the door.

How many seconds would it take me to land one foot on the stoop and undo the latch I wondered. In that second or two that frog on the right could easily make a jump at my bare bottom half of my leg. OH God I prayed, help me.

I took a deep breath and told myself I could not stand here immobilized by a stupid frog. I was psyched up and jumped for the landing; like a Bond-girl or super spy chick I undid the latch in record time and I was in and closing the door. Immediately I flashed the light on the stoop. The frog was gone.

I should have been relieved but, terror hit all anew. Was he inside? Did he get in when I came in? I jumped back and flashed the light around in circles….nothing. He was gone. It may sound funny now, but at the moment I felt emotionally beaten. I was so happy to get under the mosquito net even though I could not sleep for a while. I prayed and eventually cried myself to sleep. The next evening the word came.

A friend whom I had related the nightmare story to, told me to just stand fast in the name of Jesus. Of course, I thought of Galatians 5:1…Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free. That night I found a customized note card that was specially designed and printed for me by my daughter at Christmas. Oddly enough, the verse on the back of the card reads…It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery…Galatians 5:1. Who but God could orchestrate such perfect coincidence?

I thought about the freedom from fear that my friend had described. Christ has set us free from fear, wrath, sin, and corruption…so many more things. It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. He set us free to enjoy freedom in HIM. I thought about how HE freed me from communism when I didn’t even know HIM; how HE set me free from the addictions to alcohol and drug abuse that ran in our family; how HE set me free from dependence on anything else but HIM. I’m still working on that one, but HE set me free for freedom. I needed to stand fast in that freedom and enjoy it’s safety. Soon, and for all the nights afterward, I went to bed and fell peacefully and perfectly asleep.

EPILOGE: A few days after the frog encounter, I went to do laundry in the afternoon and guess what—yep—a frog in the laundry room perched on the iron fence at eye level. A smooth, shiny and colorful little thing that I was sure had poison darts ready to fling at me on his way to attaching to my face. However, he didn’t. He minded his own business. I did my laundry and he actually stayed there for several days afterward. Funny that nobody else noticed him. But hey, I was not hallucinating....he was there.

What are you afraid of....how do you stand fast?

Stand Fast Lesson I - Freedom

Malawian Sunset on Michingi/Chipata Road near Njewa Mission Center

Galatians 5:1 Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free…
I was reading the book of Galatians on my mornings in Malawi—enjoying the quiet and wondering why God would have me read this book in particular during this time. It became all too clear very soon.

God taught me a couple of ‘stand fast’ lessons.

As the team leader for this group, I had prayed for many weeks prior for the LORD to show me what to do and what to prepare for etc. Each time His answer was the same “NOTHING.” This disturbed me immensely. I came to the point where I even thought, perhaps I should not be going on this trip at all. Yet, I proceeded until further notice as it were and kept praying and seeking, leading the team through the preliminaries etc.

When we finally were in Malawi, I could see that God was using my natural leadership or inclination to be in control skills for navigating airports and such. And He was using my early morning devotion time as well. On the first morning at Njewa Mission Center, I was up at 5:30 a.m. finding a quiet and solitary place. Listening to the bird song and taking in the breath of Malawi. It was wonderful.

At 7:00 a.m. I met Jonathan the construction clerk. He told me the men gathering at the yet to be completed dinning hall were coming for prayer time as they do each morning. Of course, automatically I humbly asked if I could join them. He invited me enthusiastically and of course I wound up being the speaker, sharing the Bible verses for the morning. It was a tremendous and humbling moment for me to be standing in this open air dinning hall with 54 Malawian men sharing with them from the word of God. How did God do that?

Later I faced a tremendous and humbling challenge. The team challenged a decision in our itinerary, which I thought would be a highlight of the trip. It had to do with going to another village to visit our children. This particular village had challenges of its own. The last time I visited there, we had no steady water and no electricity for three days. We bathed out of barrels that collected water if it came on during the night. We ate, read and walked by candle or flashlight and guess what, we survived. However, this team was nervous about the unknown and they were comfortable at the mission center.

What I knew, was that being in the same living quarters or at least area with the children, was a treat that could not be experienced in any of our other programs in Malawi. I knew they would meet the children on the way to school and back; they would see them playing and have a chance to interact with them and the house parents, one on one, in a way that was unique. I knew it would be a highlight and that the thoughts of discomfort would soon pass away like a woman in childbirth who cannot remember her pain once the joy of her child comes.

After the meeting that night, I cried. I asked the LORD what I should do and He said “NOTHING” but I knew that meant I was to fast and pray.

The next morning I was up and in prayer. At breakfast a dear friend noticed I had not served myself breakfast. I said, no I’m not eating this morning. Then I remembered I had to take my Malaria medicine so I served myself a few bites of oatmeal or was it a piece of toast and tea—no matter. I think my friend, who had witnessed the events of the night before knew what was up, and I believe also prayed.

A little later that morning, the co-team leader, who was a man and had led teams before, returned for our devotion time. Previous to that, I told him about the night's events. I cried some more. He told me, “Carmen, you cannot be responsible for the happiness of this team…You are not their happy god.” This was the same lesson the LORD had taught him a year before. Immediately I thought of my morning devotions in Galatians.

These folks were like the Greeks—the uncircumcised whom felt compelled by the Jews the circumcised to be brought under the old law of circumcision. However, Paul said, why are you going to be entangle again in that bondage. “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” Gal 3:29. Suddenly the message came clear…these people are all one team. Even though we were literally 4 teams that arrived at different times put together, we were there as ONE team. I felt sure God wanted it this way and mentioned it to the co-leader. And I felt intense freedom because I also realized that these people were all individuals in Christ Jesus and HE ALONE wanted to make their trip UNIQUE.

Right then and there, I released the whole matter. I told the co-leader who was now going to initiate discussion on the topic, that I did not want to force anyone to come or go, but I also wanted to start speaking of these teams, as ONE team. He agreed. He gave a great talk and discussion ensued. Members battled with their choice over the next days until the time came to go. They all went to the village. They all loved it there, and we were never out of water or power. Amazing indeed.

Near the end of the trip, one team member confessed to me being in disagreement with about 90% of my decision making over the entire trip and was happy to report being wrong 100% of the time. “Every thing you wanted us to do that I didn’t want to do turned out to be a highlight of my trip.” I thanked him for the compliment, I think it was a compliment anyway….glass half full syndrome.

God made the trip for each individual including me. I so enjoyed every moment and some of those moments a lot more than others and they are burned into the soul of my life experience forever…the good, the bad, the beautiful and the ugly. God said do nothing and HE did it all.

Glory be to the LORD. Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made you free…..free to enjoy and experience HIM and let others do the same.

Hero Tales 3

Jim and the men discuss work in front of the Njewa dormitories

Photos by Chris Clark

The BRIT
He charmed us with his delightful wit and British accent. He encouraged and entertained us with his words on a variety of topics including the night sky. He blessed us with his skills as an electrician when he and the national work crew installed ceiling fans in our rooms. After our first night in an overly warm room, Jim and the work crew were in our dormitory putting in ceiling fans to help us stay cooler. When some of us moved to the nearby mud huts, he promptly had fans installed in those as well. He did not try to do all the work himself, instead with a humble and approachable attitude; he taught the men and helped troubleshoot with them until they were able to complete the jobs without him. He exemplified the COTN core value of empowering nationals. He then put his skills to good use in helping to complete the recording studio with the BROMAN team. Jeff, leader of that group, spoke for the entire group of men when he said, "We could not have done it without Jim; His being there was really a God thing." When the call for and time came for it, he prepared us a "proper cup of tea." Even without being asked, he anticipated needs in many areas and in his own quiet manner put himself in a position to help and serve. In our moments of discouragement, he said the right things that pointed us back in the right direction—of courage, trust and faith in the LORD. He never complained, he never demanded and he cheerfully smiled a lot too. At his most shinning moment he served as an escort in a busy marketplace, keeping a safeguarding eye on us while seemingly distracting us with his light-hearted talk and later, he served each one of us communion in a candlelit dinning hall on our last night together as a whole team. Over all, he was a man admired.

The Brit holds one of our children

Hero Tales 2

Ginny & Rebecca hand out t-shirts to the children at Mtsiliza

The FLY Gals
Rebecca and Ginny joined our team after a visit to Ethiopia where Ginny became bug bitten; and her bites seemed to get worse each day. One day, I finally took a closer look. I had never seen bug bites like these; large red welts with black puss filled heads. I thought they looked infected and said she should see a doctor immediately. We took her to see our heroic friend, Dr. Perry Janzen, Founder of Partners in Hope, a clinic for AIDS patients in Lilongwe. Indeed, her bites were a bit more than mere mosquitoes from Malawi could do. Ginny had been bitten by the ‘putsy’ fly in Ethiopia. Treatment began that day. Ginny endured the stinging and the unsightly welts with extreme patience. Robbin covered each bite with Vaseline and a band-aid, as prescribed by Dr. J, hoping the larva would suffocate and exit. Rebecca, washed, dried and ironed all Ginny’s clothing to kill any remaining bug infestation and stayed by Ginny’s side night and day. The next day, Janet chose to stay behind and run point on Ginny’s care along with Rebecca, while the team, already a day overdue, proceeded to visit the children at Chiwengo. Over the next 24 hours, Ginny again saw the doctor and he determined it was best to force the bugs to exit. Janet and Rebecca squeezed until all the larvas were out of Ginny’s body. Let’s just say there were more than 10 (x 7). The next day, she was improved and soon she was up and smiling again, her faith and joy filled self. At their best and most shinning moments, the team, which hated to leave Ginny behind, ministered in love to the children of Chiwengo Village (who had prepared for our coming) and continually thought of and prayed for Ginny and the ‘Fly’ gals. At their most heroic, Rebecca and Janet did the unthinkable for most of us, but did what was most necessary for taking extreme loving care of Ginny, ridding her of flies and all.

Robbin at Salima Village shared the Elephant Hut w/Janet (pic:IDP camp Uganda before coming to Malawi)

Hero Tales

Ron meeting the locals at Mtsiliza Village, Malawi Africa

NURSE RON
A 63-year-old gentleman and retired nurse. He cared for our little cuts, bruises, bug bites, tummy aches and sleepless nights with his well-prepared first aid kit, which he then donated to the budding clinic at Chiwengo Village. He ‘lent an ear’ to Chiwengo nurse, Eda and showed genuine interest in her work, while mining her for information about her needs at the new clinic. He dug a splinter or something out of someone’s toe and treated it as important as major surgery. He respected our modesty when needing to check our bug bites and never forgot to ask someone he knew was a bit under the weather how they fared the night before. He did his own laundry, carried all our heavy bags whenever he had the opportunity, washed dishes almost every night after dinner and never complained. His most shinning and endearing moment came when he became emotional on letting me know he had just spoken with his wife back home. He missed her, but, just so she knows, he took really good care of us. Often referred to as the ‘token male’ he exemplified extraordinary strength and courage when surrounded by emotional females. Well done good and faithful Ron.

Ron in front of Salima dinning hall doing his morning devotions

Heroic Baobob

1000 Year Old Baobob Tree--Zambia, Africa
photo by Beth Sondermeyer

Tall and stately; strong, faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locamotive, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound, look it's the world's favorite superhero.....

Seeing the heroic in someone is not something I typically do with those who are closest to me. I can easily see the Hero in Superman, especially when he takes Lois flying. It's not difficult to see the Heroic in the firefighter on the 11:00 o’clock news who rescues the woman and her child from the building about to collapse; or the police officer who puts himself in harms way to save the life of an innocent bystander. Some people even find little ones playing sports on a Sunday afternoon to be heroic. We have a bit here on the local news station called Eric’s Little Heroes—little kids playing baseball or some other sport. Frankly, I always thought it was inappropriate to call those cute kids heroes—because really, they were not fighting a war in Iraq or anything like that.

Webster’s definition of ‘heroic’
of or characterized by men of godlike strength and courage;
like or characteristic of a hero or his deeds; strong, brave, noble, powerful etc.
of or about a hero and his deeds, epic;
exalted, eloquent, high-flown;
daring and risky;
larger than life-size but less than colossal.

Webster’s definition of ‘hero’
Myth-Legend a man of great strength and courage; favored by the gods, and in part descended from them; often regarded as a half-god and worshipped after his death.
any man admired for his courage, nobility or exploits especially in war
any man admired for his qualities or achievements and regarded as an ideal or model

Today as I had a busy first day back at work and hoped most of the day for someone to come over and rescue me by rubbing my sore neck, I received a photo from one of my team members of their summit on Mt. Kilimajaro. I thought, how extraordinary that they could do this. Kevin, who sent me the photo, said they endured lack of sleep and weight loss and Jeff wrote later “We actually camped in the crater just below the summit. Did not do much sleeping but there were some amazing views and experiences. God was good to me and the team.”

I think this is pretty adventurous, courageous and quite an extraordinary achievement. Later as I reviwed some pictures of other team members, I saw them in this heroic admirable light. They were heroes because of some of the things they did during our time together in Malawi. They seemed 'larger than life' and I admired them for the sacrificial qualities in them that helped make a significant difference in the life of someone else. Hero Tales Follow…..

The Champion's Way

by Carmen E. Richards
Photography by Greg Poole--Manager Kafunta River Lodge, South Luangua, Zambia, Africa

Our four-tiered Toyata Land Cruiser, with eight fully equipped tourists of the bush aboard, motored along the even, red-dirt road in South Luangua National Park in Zambia, Africa. This is a nice change, I thought releasing my ‘hanging on for dear life’ grip from the steel bar in front of me. We had been in the vehicle for several hours and most of the roads were rutty, bouncing us up and down as if we were on the Indiana Jones ride at Disneyland. Here, at last, I could for a moment let go and relax.

I could freely smell the fresh and musty scent of ‘the Real Africa’ and could enjoy the various trees and grasses that were taller than usual due to the heavy rainfall. We traveled back to Kafunta River Lodge after an early morning search for the lions—monarchs of the jungle. We had heard them speaking the night before, groaning as they conversed about some bush business. When I heard them, it stilled every aspect of my being with a chilling fear and reverence. The sound rumbled in my chest like a deep cosmic hum and left me vibrating for seconds after.

Our guide, Johosophat, a husky bodied black man with an Anthony Hopkins voice, drove a good clip while chatting with one of our team members up front. I sat on the upper tier enjoying the ride with roving eyes in hopes of spotting something new and unusually beautiful. Periodically, Johosophat would spontaneously stop the vehicle turning off the engine and then say something like, “Carmen do you see the Acacia tree over there on the right? Look at the branch to the far right that is somewhat curved; about half way down there is a Lilac Breasted Roller.” I would lift my binoculars with delight to find the six inch body of color exactly where he pointed out. He did this kind of thing continuously and it amazed me that he could be driving, talking and also spotting some random bird in a tree, bush or piece of sky and be able to identify it so accurately. The man had eyes like an eagle and made my safari experience that much the nicer. (The Lilac Breasted Roller is a bird they call the Rainbow Bird because it has every color of the rainbow on its body. It is amazing and beautiful.)

We continued riding along with the hot wind blowing back our hair, feeling the warmth of the sub-equator sun beating down on our skin. Some might say we were recklessly riding since we had no hats, no sun-screen, no seat belts and were often moving 40-50 mph. However, those confinements seemed to have no place in this landscape of freedom. We came around a corner, which always lent itself to more focused staring in hopes that one might encounter a group of tall Thorncroft giraffe meandering along, hippos wrestling in the shallows or the lionesses themselves lying by the side of the road, lazy after a feeding or a kill.

This time, as we came around the bend in the road, Johosophat brought us to a full stop and our eyes rose to behold a giant male elephant with two magnificent tusks protruding from the sides of his jaw. His trunk was about five feet long, which means his body was at least ten feet tall. His head, with perfectly shaped ears, made it have a wingspan of about seven feet wide. His feet lumbered along leaving basketball size prints in the muddy road. His legs could be called ashen poplars for their size and shape. The lashes on his wrinkly eyes were course, long and curled about three inches long. At first, his eyes were shut and he just walked along the middle of the road like he owned it. Then he became aware of our vehicle and opened his eyes.

We sat there, not twenty feet away from a massive that moved steadily toward us. Soon, he began tossing his head back and forth, lifting and dropping his trunk, in continual motion with his giant legs, and leading with those glinting tusks directly at us. We were all breathless. Johosophat waited a moment to see if the ‘big guy’ would take to grass. “He is in must you see,” he said pointing to the honeydew melon sized testicles, which dripped with moisture. “This makes him a little more aggressive,” he added as he restarted the engine and backed up about twenty more feet. How did Johosophat know the Land Cruiser would start everytime, I wondered momentarily. Our eyes stayed fixed front. The elephant continued forward in the middle of the road with no apparent intention of giving way. We are playing chicken with a two-ton elephant I thought to myself, not really knowing how much he weighed. He seemed big though, like at least two-tons. Johosophat waited a minute longer then exhaled with resolve, “Ok Champion, you are the winner today. I am moving back." We stared in stunned wonder. "If he were not in must," Johosophat announced, "I would be challenging him; but today, he is the champion."

Again, the engine turned right over and backwards we went. Oddly, there were no other elephants around at this time; else, we might have been caught between them. The night before, we had seen two of the big boys fighting and tooting their horns quite aggressively. That sound also can make your spine shiver. It is like in the cartoons; it feels like it could blow your hair and body all the way back to bed.

Champion stopped at a nearby patch of tall pampas grass and we stopped as well some feet away. We watched him pluck the grass about three fourths of the way down and plunk it into his mouth with that handy trunk. We could see stubby teeth inside his mouth and he began chewing, making hollow chomp and swish sounds. His entire body was wrinkly and he kept it on the road so that we could not pass. Soon, he grew tired of that patch of grass and turned toward us again shaking his head and tossing his trunk as if saying, “Get back jack, I’m coming through.”
At this point Johosophat determined the elephant was not going to give way. We were pulled off to the side of the road and I thought perhaps Johosophat would just let him walk on by us. The road seemed wide enough for both of us but Johosophat must have remembered his scripture and thought this particular wide road might lead to destruction. So instead, he became no talk and all action. As Champion approached, Johosophat asked us to be very quiet and still. Then he pulled the Land Cruiser back about forty yards until he found a small clearing. Underneath the shade of a giant Baobob tree, occupied by active monkeys and meandering baboons, sat groups of serene impalas and pukus. They were families enjoying quality time together at the park.

Johosophat pulled our backside right into their afternoon siesta and I turned to see a large baboon hurry from his throne point and scamper up the tree. There I saw many of his family members moving about to make way for this alpha male. The impala and puku remained motionless in their quiet beauty, unaffected by our intrusion or the march of the Champion. Johosophat killed the engine and we rested with all else. Champion was on pace.

We watched him with bated breath, frozen like statues in amazement and wonder, barely whispering with giddy hysteria. The animals behind us did not move a muscle. Champion moved to about fifteen feet from us and I noticed his eyes seemed shut. He walked like a blind man who instinctively knows his way to his destination. A brave enthusiast with zoom lense decided to get a closer-up shot and clicked the shutter of the camera. Champion opened his eyes and with a slight nod of his head almost seemed to say, “Yeah, that’s all of me you’ll ever get the best of.” And then, he continued on his way and out of our sight walking down the middle of ‘his’ road. I never imagined I would come to Africa to play chicken with a male elephant in must. We were chaste and he was the admired Champion.

Epilogue…10 days later...Muyende Bwino (travel well)
Lilongwe, Malawi--Kamuzu Airport: We brought some of our team members to the airport for departure. We unexpectedly met up with a friend and lodge owner from Zambia near the location we had visited. We were surprised to see him, as he was to stay in South Luangua for six months. Tony, a gregarious and kind, clear eyed UK citizen, we fondly nicknamed "The Brit 2" (Jim 'the Brit' was our original UK citizen back at Njewa Mission Center in Malawi) told us the day after we left the reserve; the Kafunta River Lodge, had been evacuated and soon after that all the lodges along the river had been cleared out due to severe flooding. The Luangua River had overflowed its banks and flooded the entire valley. The heavy rainstorms caused the flooding and washed out an entire distant town--Mfuwe. Tony described the five feet of water in his lodge area that forced them to swim from the kitchen to the reception area. He told us many others were evacuated holding a machete in one hand, while grasping ropes with the other and watching with all eyes for crocs. “Two male elephants were washed away by the rushing flood waters,” he said. One of the bodies had been recovered down river. We thought of our Champion and hoped he was not one of them. The best we could do was grieve with Tony in those short moments, rejoice that he was well and pray for the people of Mfuwe, our friends back at Kafunta--Greg, Johosophat, Mayam and the rest of the staffs from all the lodges in the valley.

On the day we encountered him, the Champion of the Bush, it seemed unfathomable to me that anything could move or defeat him. Now, here we faced the possibility that water, a liquid, giving, flowing substance that God had created for refreshment of the earth, man and all creatures, could have been his downfall. I thought to myself, why are we surprised? Why do we doubt the forces of nature that God has created and thereby doubt God Himself? Are we really so arrogant to think we can hold back the sea and the firmament, the rivers, the movement of the wind or the earth? We are foolish indeed to think so because only God can ordain such things. Job 38-42.

Perhaps this explains why it was so amazingly miraculous for the disciples and others to see Jesus calm the storm, walk on the water, call the dead back to life etc. because they recognized the Divine in what He did and the finiteness of who they were in comparison. This humility and recognition of the superior forces is what we need in our world today for more people to accept Christ for who He said He was. He said, “Believe Me that I am in the Father and the Father in Me; or else, believe Me, for the sake of the works themselves.” John 14:11

Jesus asks us to believe Him. Is this really so difficult when He has given so many viable proofs of His Divinity? He also said, “Let not your heart be troubled, you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions, if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you, and if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am you may be also. And where I go, you know, and the way, you know…I am the way the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” John 14:1-6

Why do we trouble our hearts so much in trying to find any other way to God except through Jesus Christ? It is so simple really. Either we choose to believe or we choose not to. Like Thomas who doubted and then upon seeing with his own two eyes declared “My LORD and my God” we must not be “unbelieving, but believing” as Jesus said. John 20:27-29. We must see Him through the eyes of faith and acknowledge Jesus for who He really is. Then we will be counted among those of whom Christ said, “Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” John 20:29

We live in a world where we think we know it all and can do it all. However, God and His forces are no match for the sturdiest of us. We do not see Him in flesh and blood as they did in the time of Christ on the earth, but we see Him via word, Spirit and truth as he commanded us to worship Him. We see Him by faith, by the testimony of faithful witnesses, by the sure word of prophecy, through the everyday Divine miracles He accomplishes in, through and for us. Just like the Champion of the Bush who will not yield the road, Jesus Christ is the Champion of Heaven who pursues with patience and loving perseverance, declaring, “Believe Me, Come, Follow Me; Narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life and there are few who find it.” Matthew 7:14 To enter the Champion's way we must first love and then believe.

Photography by Greg Poole--Manager Kafunta River Lodge, South Luangua, Zambia, Africa

Re-Entry Malawi 2007

"Sleep would be sweet, if I could spend it dreaming of You...."by Carmen E. Richards

SLEEP seems to be a recurring topic for me. At home I have trouble sleeping and not sleeping. However, typically on the road, I can sleep anywhere and often do--just ask my team members. Recently I returned from a three-week trip to Malawi, Africa... by way of Lilongwe to Johannesburg to Amsterdaam to Seattle - 30 + hours of travel

I am happy to report that after some sleepless nights which I used to catch up on 24 and Prison Break online, I slept all through the night last night and woke up on cue just before 6:00 a.m. That is pretty close to my ‘normal’ routine. I arrived back home on Monday night and it took me until Thursday night to do that. It’s still not completely normal but getting closer.


PROCESSING
Leaving behind the beauties of Malawi and returning to the beauties of the USA has been Difficult—I have been swinging from elated to despondent; enjoying my own bed and missing my Lion bunk, happy for the solitude and desperately lonely, glad for the lack of routine and frantically craving it; just to name a few of the emotions. I recognize this pendulum as the familiar process I go through each time I return from travel or a church retreat or even from visiting dear friends that I have not seen in a while. It is the process of (Re-entry). I have a sneaking suspicion that my fellow team members might be feeling something similar or at least feeling the swing in some way. No worries, this is normal—which seems like an oxymoron to me because it does not feel normal at all.

Anyway, I have been making a list of all the things I am thankful for here and a list of the things I am praying for back in Malawi. This is helping my process—to pray. I brought the book “Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World” by Joanna Weaver to Malawi with me but did not get to read it very much. Well, I started on the way home and today I read this….

…That is why Paul sent a wake up letter to his beloved church in Galatia. He called the Judaizers’ gospel slavery, and he added, “You foolish Galatians! Who has bewitched you?...After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?” Gal 3:1-3

If we aren’t careful, we can fall prey to the same kind of lies the Galatians fell for—lies that tell us that we must perform in order to earn God’s love. We can add so many requirements to our faith that the “one thing” is swallowed by the “many” and the “best” is obliterated by the “good.” The thing we must understand is that God did not choose us to “use” us.

We are not spiritual Oompa-Loompas in some cosmic chocolate factory, working night and day to churn out a smoother, better-tasting Christianity.

We were not created to fill some egotistical need God has for praise—the angels forever encircle His throne with worship.

We are not some celestial science project; laboratory mice let loose in a maze to see how they interact.

No, the Bible makes it clear that God created us because He longs to have fellowship with us…”only one thing is needed”—and that is found in true fellowship with Him. (pg 61-63)
Reference verse Luke 10:42 “There is really only one thing worth being concerned about—Mary has discovered it—and I won’t take it away from her.” New Living Translation.

I read this today and it put words to my feelings and action to my inability to respond.

God desires true fellowship with me.

I wrote in my journal just before reading these passages.
“…Time to process: I’m home in the grey cold and glad to be home honestly, but I miss the adventure of it all. I miss the companionship and the camaraderie…we REALLY do need to be in Heaven since that is the only place where our deepest loneliness can be cured and our greatest joy truly realized—in the presence of our LORD Himself.” (CER Malawi Journal)

That is the escapist in me somewhat—but the book put paint to it—true fellowship with Him. So, I am just passing on the prescription of True Fellowship with Him in hopes that it helps if you are going through the confusing process of re-entry.

RE-ENTRY
For me, I’ve had a few people call or email and ask me about the safari, say they are glad I am home safe and perhaps ask me about the trip in general wanting to hear only a few seconds.

My husband keeps asking me to tell him everything about the trip and then says, “you’re not back yet; I want my wife back,” because I can’t seem to stay focused and keep falling asleep and waking up at odd times. I’ve told him two stories about different events—visiting David Samuel at Kamuzu Academy and about Champion the elephant and the floods to South Luangua, I remain concerned about our friends and the people of that area.

My cat, Melchizadek, keeps crawling into my lap when I am trying to write or type so that I can pet him, it’s most inconvenient, but periodically I stop the fingers tapping and rub them behind his ears the way he likes. Then the phone rings and the petting stops and the typing and thoughts are interrupted by real life—like the ARC truck being in our area next week and do we have any donations. A bill needs to be paid, groceries need to be bought, I must go to the gym etc. It’s all a bit odd really and so much more complicated than the last three weeks in Malawi.

However, Mel, my cat for short, reminds me of Mphatso (Gift) the German shepherd puppy who kept getting underfoot and in trouble when we were in Malawi. He was so cute and kept trying to hang out with the 'big' dogs Hudson and Gideon in charge of guarding the compound. They escorted me often along the grassy and red muddy fields between the main dormitories and the thatched hut Salima Village where I slept.

Anyway, so far this is my re-entry experience. And I understand even though primarily God may not have created me to USE me, but rather to have fellowship with Him—I love that by the way—I know that He will use me eventually to share about Malawi and the beautiful children who are growing and dreaming because they have been given opportunities by God using COTN and people from all over, like those from the team.

I know in a few days this fog will clear and the pendulum will come center and it will be revealed (pongono, pongono) little by little, what it is God will have me do in response to our trip to Malawi.

For now, I remain endeavoring to choose that good thing of fellowship with Him.

It’s interesting too that God had me reading Galatians while in Malawi—no coincidence—rather deliberate plan on His part and I remember writing and talking about true fellowship with each other and how that revolves around the word of God.

So, I’m taking the ‘queue’ and endeavoring in times of “swing” to find myself in HIM through His word enjoying the ‘one true thing’ fellowship with Him.

Blessings,
Carmen

www.COTNI.org